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Last year, Oden broke his kneecap, Roy tore his meniscus, Travis Outlaw broke his foot, Rudy Fernandez had back surgery, Nicolas Batum tore his labrum, and even coach Nate McMillan ruptured his Achilles tendon during practice.
What is going on with Portland? Is their practice facility built over an ancient Native American orthopedic surgeon’s office? Did the team trainer desecrate a mummy’s knee? Do they all need to be wearing Shape-Ups?
Maybe, because it’s Portland, they’re relying on a hipster trainer - giving players ironically retro health care with vintage medicine that’s so bad, it’s good.